7/5//10

gazorbnik.

he wakes up with bowie's scary monsters in his head and makes coffee and comes down to the bunker to sit before the computer.

to begin a poem that is not a poem because he is not a poet.

he hates poetry.

he feels all poets should be taken out and shot.

while he sits on the beach of the island in the eye of a storm raging on and otherwise calm sea.

the sea is humanity.

while on the shores of the sea are camped the peoples of the earth and the nations of the world who prepare for and make war.

as he watches the waves come crashing in and washing out again over and over.

while everyone else in the house is sleeping.

he goes up for more coffee.

he comes back down and lights a cigarette.

he farts.

as he is a bit confused at the moment.

as he imagines the machine everyone knows as nancy coming up the beach and sitting facing him her back to the sea.

her chrome skin gleaming in the morning sun of another perfect day.

as a spaceship hovers nearby.

hey, nancy says.

hey, he says.

i thought i'd find you here, nancy says.

be here now, he says.

yeah, nancy says, wherever one might imagine the here and now to be.

it works for me, he says.

so, nancy says, what's happening?

just sitting here watching the waves, he says.

sometimes that's all one can do, nancy says.

yup, he says.

and it's all madness.

a world gone mad.

he's gone mad.

everyone he sees is mad.

and he goes up to take his meds.

and now the state takes care of him.

he gained victory over himself.

long live big brother.

or not.

as april and kids get up.

while his baby is still sleeping.

as he smokes a bowl.

as he has given up watching tv.

there is nothing there for him anymore.

as he has given up just about everything else.

as it all becomes just meaningless dada to him in his present state of mind.

as the whole world seems to be ending.

this womb that has nurtured and protected us as we evolved through our gestation to this point where and when everything has been used up.

now we must be born as the womb collapses and set us free.

as the contractions are already beginning.

and the earth can heal itself back again.

a new creature on the earth in a world of ruin.

or something like that.

or not.

and he's hungry and needs to go to the store.

he doesn't want to.

he hates people.

they are all insane.

and he's hidden himself for the immediate duration moment by moment down here in the bunker.

as he sits before the computer for most of the day waiting for inspiration to write more words that are meaningless dada.

but the thing about everything being meaningless is that then it is open for us to give it any meaning we might imagine it having.

oh boy.

and he is imagining that everything exists for his amusement.

for everyone's amusement.

why not?

as he writes out of some compulsive need to keep himself amused.

as the words come to him from somewhere else transmitted to him as he goes along on the pathless path to nowhere.

now here.

or not.

because none of this needs to be whatever it might be assumed to be.

whatever one imagines it to be.

and who can possibly know that but oneself?

as long as one is continually amused by what one might be imagining.

that is its only meaning.

now and forever.

but nevermind that.

so, nancy says, what does gazorbnik mean?

it's just a word i made up or stole from somewhere but if i did i don't remember from where or when, he says.

so, nancy says, it means nothing.

for the moment, he says. but i'm trying to think of something for it to mean maybe.

if it's possible for anything to mean anything, nancy says.

yeah, he says, that's one of the problems.

as molly cat lies up on top of the monitor to get warm.

as it all continues.

as he lights another cigarette.

speaking of meaning, he says, have i told you my theory about god?

you have a theory about god? nancy says.

yes, he says. everyone has a theory about god.

but many don't believe god exists, nancy says.

that's their theory, he says.

so, nancy says, what's your theory about god?

well, he says, let's imagine that there is a god.

a good place to start, nancy says.

now, he says, let's imagine that this god is all alone in the void without spacetime or nothing.

yes, nancy says.

now, he says, imagine this god going mad and hallucinating everything laughing and screaming at the possibilities of it all.

yes, nancy says.

and imagine this god diving into what it has created to lose itself from existing in the void awhile, he says.

yes, nancy says.

and that's my theory, he says.

that's it? nancy says.

yup, he says.

it's not much, nancy says.

it's what i got, he says.

and you believe this? nancy says.

i believe in nothing, he says. i imagine this as a possibility.

oh, nancy says.

and he goes up to make a peanut butter and raisin sandwich and to piss.

and this is also his confession of all the crimes against humanity he has imagined.

it wasn't supposed to be this way.

but what other way could it be when one considers what is and is not possible under these conditions and circumstances?

imagine that.

and him and nancy decide that they've had enough of the beach and get up and fly back to the house by the garden deep in the midst of the forest of dreams.

and they land by the open kitchen door and step inside to sit opposite at a table next to a window.

while nancy gets a bottle of vodka from the freezer and sets it on the table between them.

they take swigs of it gasping with each one.

and there's a bag of pistachios there to be munched on.

and he smokes some more of the bowl and coughs.

it is it.

it is not it.

so, he says, this is it.

so it would seem, nancy says.

but this is not it, he says.

of course, nancy says.

and it all is meaningless dada, he says.

yes, nancy says, it would seem that way to the mind tuned to see it that way.

it takes the practice of perception, he says.

one needs to turn one's brain inside out and upside down, nancy says.

as one follows along on the pathless path, he says.

as one begins by knowing nothing, nancy says.

yes, he says, i do know that.

and one discovers that it's all the same, nancy says.

and one imagines knowing everything, he says.

but one has no way of ever possibly explaining it to anyone, nancy says.

but one gives it a try anyway, he says.

and he sits before the computer wondering what the fuck.

he is imaging knowing nothing but possibly everything.

he discovers that it is all the same.

to crack the sky with god madly laughing and screaming inside one's own head.

and is this possibly anything like realization?

and should he be worried about this troubling thought he imagines thinking?

as it continues for some odd reason.

as the waves are pulled by the tides pulled by the moon.

the universe as one big organism wondering what the fuck.

as it struggles to know itself.

as it tickles its fancy free.

all blinking on/off in a moment divided.

he yawns.

it may be time almost for a nap.

but not yet.

he imagines that he is on a secret mission.

he's got the perfect cover being absolutely no one.

an absurdist monk in his bunker writing and posting his amused musing not-poem for all the world to ignore amid the noise of everyone shouting to be heard one above the other as it all comes crashing down.

cracking up.

so, nancy says, where we at now?

just sitting here now babbling nonsense, he says.

is that all this is? nancy says.

yes, he says.

what's the point? nancy says.

the point is to keep oneself amused as much as possible, he says.

and are we doing that? nancy says.

i'm amused, he says.

so am i, nancy says.

and hopefully others would be too who might happen by and read this, he says.

i doubt that, nancy says.

so do i, he says.

except he's forgotten whatever secret mission he might be on.

and he doesn't know who he might ask to find out.

he's on his own.

a shadow in the shadows.

a light in the light.

and he'd like to turn someone on like he'd been turned on by others before him.

pass it down the line for what it's worth.

like some sort of ongoing revolution, baby.

it comes and goes like waves on the beach pulled by the tides pulled by the moon.

so, nancy says, i was imagining of a rug and an ashtray.

i was imagining of a tree frog and a tesseract, he says.

i was imagining a spoon that is not a spoon, nancy says.

i was imagining explaining everything, he says.

how would someone go about doing that? nancy says.

i have no idea, he says. but it seems one needs to have a theory of everything.

and do we have one? nancy says.

yes, he says.

and what does our theory have to say for itself? nancy says.

that is what we are trying to explain, he says.

is that what we are doing? nancy says.

yes, he says. what did you think we were doing?

i thought we were amusing ourselves, nancy says.

we are doing that as well, he says.

yes, nancy says. it would seem so.

and he remembers one of his favorite songs by david gilmour.

There's no way out of here
When you come in
You're in for good
There was no promise made
The part you played
The chance you took

There are no boundaries set
The time and yet
You waste it still
So it slips through your hands
Like grains of sand
You watch it go

There's no time to be lost
You'll pay the cost
So get it right
There's no way out of here
When you come in
You're in for good

There never was there an answer
There an answer
Not without listening
Without seeing

There are no answers here
When you look out
You don't see in
There was no promise made
The part you played
The chance you took

There's no way out of here
When you come in
You're in for good

There never was there an answer
There an answer
Not without listening
Without seeing

There's no way out of here
When you come in
You're in for good
There was no promise made
The part you played
The chance you took

There's no way out of here
When you come in
You're in for good
There's no way out of here
When you come in
You're in for good
There are no answers here
When you look out
You don't see in
There's no way out of here
When you come in
You're in for good

and he remembers one of his other favorite songs by john lennon.

Come on come on come on come on
Come on it's such a joy
Come on it's such a joy
Come on lets take it easy
Come on lets take it easy
Take it easy take it easy
Everybody's got something to hide except for me and
my monkey.

The deeper you go the higher you fly
The higher you fly the deeper you go
So come on come on
Come on it's such a joy
Come on it's such a joy
Come on lets make it easy
Come on lets make it easy.

Take it easy take it easy
Everybody's got something to hide except for me and
my monkey.

Your inside is out and your outside is in
Your outside is in and your inside is out
So come on come on
Come on it's such a joy
Come on it's such a joy
Come on lets make it easy
Come on lets make it easy
Make it easy make it easy
Everybody's got something to hide except for me and
my monkey.

and if one were to put those two songs together one would have his basic philosophy.

what more is there needed to be stated other than that?

but as it amuses him to do so he continues.

and he remembers another favorite song by argent.

And if it's bad
Don't let it get you down, you can take it
And if it hurts
Don't let them see you cry, you can take it

Hold your head up, hold your head up
Hold your head up, hold your head high

And if they stare
Just let them burn their eyes on you moving
And if they shout
Don't let them change a thing what you're doing

Hold your head up, hold your head up
Hold your head up, hold your head high

another part of his basic philosophy.

and he was gonna take a nap but decided not to.

maybe later.

he has to go to the store for some food.

but there's never anything there he wants to eat.

kids are in chaos upstairs.

and him and nancy decide to come out to the garden where we turn them on and they dance and sing and fall down and laugh beneath the tree of life as they eat the fruit thereof as the spell of the knowledge of good and evil leaves them for the moment.

and adam and steve come upon them and sit facing them.

as a spaceship hovers nearby.

so, adam says, what have you two been up to?

we could ask you the same question, he says.

we were just fucking, adam says.

yeah, steve says, sticking our cocks up each other's assholes.

sounds like fun, he says.

somebody's gotta do it, steve says.

right, he says.

and he goes up and makes a swiss and red onion sandwich.

he smokes a cigarette.

so, nancy says, we were just hanging out talking dada.

there's plenty of dada to talk about, steve says.

it would seem so, he says.

what sort of dada are we talking about? adam says.

meaningless dada, he says.

is there any other kind? steve says.

apparently not, he says.

and he goes up and takes a nap with his baby.

he wakes up and makes coffee.

he comes back to the garden where the other are still at.

we should go to the carnival, adam says.

what for? he says.

there's all the rides and stuff, adam says.

like the gloryhole booth, steve says, i feel like sucking some cock.

i hate people, he says. and i don't do rides. my life is a ride enough.

well, steve says, i guess that counts you out. but me and adam are going.

right, adam says.

and they get up and fly off to the carnival and him and nancy go back into the house and sit at the kitchen table.

and he goes up for more coffee.

why do you hate people? nancy says.

they're ugly and mean, he says.

not all of them, nancy says.

the ones that aren't are scared, he says. either way it's all that charged negative energy i can't deal with.

being with the 3 of us didn't seem to bother you, nancy says.

not if i can deal with people individually, he says. 2 or 3 are ok usually but sometimes that can be too much. groups suck. they're elitist and exclusive and fascist as a rule from small circles of friends to global organizations. the collective mind is a terrible thing even individually.

but this is all your imagination, nancy says. who's gonna harm you here?

i still don't like even imagining crowds, he says. it gives me the heebee jeebees.

twist and shout, nancy says.

god madly laughing and screaming inside my head, he says.

well, nancy says. you're safe here. you don't need to imagine anything you don't want to.

i don't plan to, he says. let them all go to hell.

imagine that, nancy says.

they seem to already in it, he says.

and you're not? nancy says.

i'm part in hell and part in heaven, he says. i try to keep myself in the middle balanced on the apex of it all.

just sitting on a fence, nancy says, waiting to fall one way or the other.

or be pushed one way or the other, he says. i've been in both and neither are very much fun.

i don't imagine that they are, nancy says.

and he goes up to poop.

he sits before the computer amused by himself and the absurdity of his own existence.

ha ha ha.

and few will understand and be also amused.

amusement isn't an easy thing to come by.

one bangs one's head against the walls for so long until one is silly from it.

so many live such miserable lives in such pain and suffering.

and what does one do about that?

one can only look out for oneself and try to live in the world of others causing as little harm to them as one can get away with.

if only others would feel the same.

but what exactly constitutes harm and what doesn't?

the way things are connected one might buy a simple bar of soap and set in motion a chain of events that results in another being tortured.

but then it might all result in saving another's life.

one can never know.

one can be paralyzed by it but non-action can result in the same kind of chains of events that go either way or the other.

one leaves it to the gods to decide what happens and what doesn't.

if there are gods.

but there are at least as we imagine them.

they may be beings that exist in a dimension that we can only perceive them with imagination.

but fuck the gods.

what have they done for us but create us for their own amusement in this world of delight and terror?

no peace, love and understanding among us for them.

they want action and plenty of it.

all while they idly watch on tv and laugh at our ape antics and decide our fortune with a whim.

but he has to admit that the whims guiding his fortune have been fortunate so far.

his life has pretty much been cake.

he has no idea how or why.

it is what it is.

oh well.

so, he says, what now?

now, nancy says, everything.

yes, he says. and if we only knew what everything is.

there are those who claim to know, nancy says.

all they have is some theory they made up about it, he says. anybody can have a theory.

can we have one? nancy says.

i imagine we can, he says. why not?

so, nancy says, what is our theory about?

that's difficult to explain, he says, since it tries to explain everything.

that's something to explain, nancy says.

i think our theory should contain all theories that there are to be had, he says.

that could be billions, nancy says. one at least for each of us. maybe possibly more.

let there be an infinite number of theories, he says.

but wouldn't many of those theories contradict each other? nancy says.

so? he says.

so, nancy says, that would mean our theory contradicts itself.

so? he says.

wouldn't that make it invalid? nancy says.

yes, he says, according to many and their theories it would. but those are rationalogical based theories. ours is an irrationalogical theory.

what the difference? nancy says.

rationalogic is based on the logic of the rational, he says. it states a+b=c. irrationalogic is based on the logic of the irrational. it can state a+cow=blueberry muffin.

but which is right and which is wrong? nancy says.

rationalogic is like a dog on a leash, he says. it can only go where the links of that chain allow it to go and as far. irrationalogic is like a dog running free. it can go wherever the fuck it wants to.

like in someone's flower bed, nancy says.

it happens, he says. that's one of the reasons irrationalogic gets such a bad reputation.

so, nancy says, we should follow irrationalogic.

not necessarily, he says. rationalogic has its uses. like giving us indoor plumbing.

i like indoor plumbing, nancy says.

but rationalogic by definition can't tell us everything, he says. it's based on ration which is only part of something not the whole of it.

so, nancy says, we follow both?

most people do, he says.

so, nancy says, we're still left with our theory including an infinite number of other theories.

but most of those will cancel one another out, he says. that'll make things a little simpler.

so, nancy says, what do we do?

we just have to include it all in and mix it up and see what falls out, he says.

seems simple enough, nancy says. let's do it.

i've been doing it my whole life, he says.

and what's fallen out so far? nancy says.

i've fallen out, he says.

ouch, nancy says.

yup, he says.

and then adam and steve come back and into the kitchen and sit down at the table.

as a spaceship hovers nearby.

you should have come with us, adam says. someone got thrown off one of the rides.

yeah, steve says. all broken up with bones sticking out and screaming agony. it was great.

terrific, he says.

i dig that shit, steve says.

me too, adam says.

what about the gloryhole booth? nancy says. how was that?

a little slow, adam says. we should go at night when there'd be more people.

we sucked our fair share of cock though, steve says.

yeah, adam says, and all the money goes to charity.

how special, he says.

so, steve says, what are you up to?

we were just discussing our theory of everything, nancy says.

what about it? adam says.

it includes all other theories, nancy says.

so, steve says, what good is it?

it amuses us, he says.

that's good enough, adam says.

but does it explain anything? steve says.

it explains what one wants it to explain, he says.

can it explain a banana? adam says.

what's to know about a banana? he says.

what is it? steve says.

i have no idea, he says. we haven't gotten that far yet.

how far have you gotten? steve says.

nowhere, he says.

now here, nancy says.

same difference, steve says.

and he goes up to make alfredo noodles.

and he sits before the computer wondering as usual.

this and that and the other thing going on in his head.

all buzzing like bees.

welcome to the future.

relax.

as his baby watches her tv and he escapes to pandoraland for those strange sounds that tingle his brain.

and besides this being entirely pointless except as it may amuse us as it attempts to explain everything.

ha.

like any of them know anything to explain.

stupid and ignorant.

and each crazier than the other.

and the house is quiet with the kids at their dad's for the night.

as he takes a couple of tokes from another bowl.

immaculate.

as this is what he imagines for himself now.

as this is what it has all come to for him along on the pathless path.

as we watch and wait for the show to begin.

the greatest show on earth.

and we have front row center balcony seats.

before we're taken out and shot when the revolution comes.

and it comes from anywhere and everywhere.

all around the globe people frustrated about this and that and the other thing in their heads.

until the time is right.

revolution.

then it's all meet the new boss same as the old boss thing.

but few think that far in advance except those who would be the new boss.

visualize rioting.

billions dying in a world gone mad.

when the lights go out.

when the food is gone.

oh dear.

oh well.

but, adam says, so much has been explained already.

all according to theory, he says.

are we saying there is nothing real and true? steve says.

there is the real true revolution, he says.

the one that'll have us all taken out and shot? adam says.

that's the one, he says. it's pretty much a matter of who gets to us first.

and he goes up to take his meds.

and they all light cigarettes except adam.

so, adam says, what does that mean?

it means that nothing that has been explained need concern us, he says.

then what are we concerned with? adam says.

everything itself, he says.

who knows what it is? adam says.

everybody's got a theory, he says.

and we've included their theories in with our theory, adam says.

correct, he says.

so, steve says, we're attempting to explain everything?

everything we can in the time that's left us before the world ends as we know it, he says.

what do we know about everything? steve says.

everything is it, nancy says.

it? adam says.

it is it, he says, and/or it is not it.

the prime duality, steve says. existence and/or nonexistence.

yes, he says. everything and/or nothing.

and all that lies in the middle between, nancy says.

and we in the middle of that, he says.

with infinity the center is everywhere, adam says.

exactly, he says.

and we've nothing to hide, steve says.

we've been through all our closets and dragged out what was in there, he says.

sometimes kicking and screaming into the light of our consciousness, steve says.

like that means anything, he says.

it may mean more than it seems, nancy says.

i thought it was meaningless dada, adam says.

it is, he says. but that gives it whatever meaning we might imagine it having.

i suppose, adam says.

so, steve says, as it all continues like waves coming and going on the beach pulled by the tides pulled by the moon.

yeah, he says, it's all like that.

it's a hard thing to comprehend, adam says.

most of it is confusion, steve says.

one must comprehend one's own confusion, he says.

how does one do that? adam says.

following along on the pathless path, he says.

this is beginning to sound like dogma doo-doo, steve says.

it is dogma doo-doo, he says, of the artchurch.

as we chant through our mantras, nancy says.

the not-poem as fugue, he says.

the interweaving of thematic variations repeating, nancy says.

following along on the pathless path, he says.

following the rituals of the artchurch, nancy says.

by doubtfully following the dada-ananda, he says, the one true/false guru.

as we will, nancy says.

as we imagine, he says.

but nevermind all that, nancy says.

he eats some pretzels as he sits before the computer wondering about social darwinism.

there's a theory that they have included in with their theory of everything.

as many would argue against it.

as many would argue for it.

as many couldn't care less either way.

as many know when to keep their mouths shut.

there are many theories that are individual personal theories.

there are many theories that are produced for the masses.

and some who cannot tell the difference.

and our theory is both, he says, for the individual and the collective.

our theory is both a blessing and a curse, steve says.

as we are in both heaven and hell, adam says.

as we are under the spell of the knowledge of good and evil, he says.

as we choose to imagine it of our own free will, steve says.

if we have any, he says.

don't we? adam says.

some would argue yes, he says. some would argue no.

some would argue maybe, steve says.

i would argue that even an omniscient and omnipotent god doesn't have free will, he says, but can only act as itself being that.

you are a fool, nancy says.

yes, he says.

i would argue that there is no god, steve says.

it works with our theory either way, he says.

fuck our theory, steve says.

sure, he says. fuck it.

and steve bends our theory over and gives it a few up the ass until he cums all inside it.

feel better now? he says.

much, steve says.

as a spaceship hovers nearby.

so, nancy says, where we at now?

well, he says, steve just fucked our theory.

yes, nancy says. i know.

well, he says, i don't know what that means.

rape is violence, nancy says.

according to some theories, he says.

any reasonable theory, nancy says.

we often feel that way about one theory or another, he says, but that does not make them more real and true than any other.

are we looking for a theory that is real and true? steve says.

not necessarily, he says.

real and true is whatever one perceives it to be, steve says.

that's what some theories hold, he says.

we can theorize ourselves into oblivion, steve says.

maybe that's the point, he says.

i thought the point was to be amused, adam says.

that too, he says.

i think we are becoming confused, nancy says.

i've always been confused, he says.

i have too, steve says.

me too, adam says.

what difference does it make? he says.

none to me, steve says. this is how it always seemed normal.

what a drag not to be confused, adam says.

i would imagine that it would be, he says.

and he decides to go to bed.

and he wakes up and coffee is made.

he comes down to the bunker and out to the house by the garden.

hey, they say.

hey, he says.

what's up? nancy says.

i'm trying to wake up, he says.

well, nancy says, do it, there's things to do.

like what? he says.

like explaining everything, nancy says.

or what we think everything is, steve says.

what we imagine everything is, he says.

like it matters, adam says.

as long as it keeps us amused, he says.

yeah, steve says. it all turns into nothing in the end.

if there is an end, he says.

there'll be an end to us, steve says.

but who knows how many times we may come back to it? he says.

or never, steve says.

if we are the gods diving into it all like us diving into the waves of the sea to swim around in it awhile, he says.

don't the gods know everything? adam says.

not necessarily, he says. they might be creatures as well are we are.

creatures of what? adam says.

creatures of it, he says. that prime thing.

creatures of the god madly laughing and screaming in our heads, nancy says.

are we saying there is a single source of everything? steve says.

many theories would argue otherwise, he says.

many theories would argue otherwise about anything, adam says.

and the war continues, he says, that can never be won.

will we ever reach an agreement? adam says.

an agreement about what? he says.

an agreement about anything, adam says.

not that i ever hope to see, he says.

so, adam says, we just keep arguing and fighting forever?

it would seem that way, he says.

what about this new creature on the earth? nancy says.

what creature is that? adam says.

evolved and born from us, he says, as the world comes to an end as we know it.

do you really think so? steve says.

i would imagine so, he says.

and what will it be? steve says.

cyborgs, he says.

cyborgs? adam says.

us totally incorporated into the machine, he says.

but many would resist, adam says.

they will become extinct, he says.

nothing but a bunch of stupid apes anyway, steve says.

right, he says.

and he goes up for more coffee and to poop.

i have nothing to do with this, nancy says.

but i imagine that you were designed and built to be the midwife to our birth, he says.

i suppose, nancy says. if that is what you want. but as the world is destroyed so is the machine.

as long as there is us, he says, there is the machine. the machine was born in the caves of our consciousness at the dawn of our conception.

if you say so, nancy says.

i imagine so, he says.

then i will do my best, nancy says.

that is all any of us can do, he says.

is what we are doing our best? adam says.

under the circumstances, he says.

what circumstances? adam says.

the circumstances that we have been driven mad by the world, he says, and now we live in the wilderness of our own minds isolated from the others with their greed for everything.

and what can our best ever hope to do? steve says.

amuse someone, he says, who happens by to read this.

that's our whole contribution? adam says.

what else can it be? he says.

if we market it right, steve says, we could be a sensation and we could make millions.

too much like work, he says. i'm lazy.

more lazy than crazy, nancy says.

that's probably true, he says.

what is truth? adam says.

our lord and savior jesus h. christ wouldn't answer that question and neither will i, he says.

you believe in jesus? steve says.

there's always the possibility, he says, though doubtful.

we're all going straight to hell if there is jesus, steve says.

a part of us, he says.

a part? adam says.

when the wheat is separated from the chaff, he says.

yeah, nancy says, many people get that wrong.

how so? adam says.

they believe it means that jesus comes through the field and selects one plant over another of who has been saved and who hasn't, nancy says. when that is not how wheat is harvested. the seed of christ lies within all of us to varying degrees and we are all gathered together and taken to the threshing floor which is the end of the world and we are all divided from ourselves into what is saved and what is discarded from us.

that seems to make a fair amount of sense, adam says.

yeah, steve says, to an idiot.

we are idiots, he says.

i suppose, steve says.

so, adam says, what is the christ?

it is that within us that allows us to tolerate one another and get along, nancy says.

like that'll ever happen, steve says.

it might, he says.

the gods will not allow that, adam says. they must be entertained.

then our revolution must overthrown the gods, he says.

good luck convincing anyone of doing that, steve says.

many do not need to be convinced, he says. they have done it for themselves already.

have we done that? adam says.

we're working on it, he says.

and what then? steve says.

we become the gods, he says.

and so, adam says, we just end up doing the same as them.

probably, he says. but having been mistreated as we have been we do it differently.

that's what all revolutions claim to do, steve says. but once those who lead it gain power they change their tune.

but there are no leaders to this revolution, he says, it is spontaneous among all of us. a revolution of evolution.

i'll believe it when i see it, steve says.

you'll see it when you believe it, he says.

whatever, steve says.

but this is all meaningless dada, nancy says. we must remember that.

yes, he says. it goes nowhere.

now here, nancy says.

that too, he says.

now here is nowhere? adam says.

it can be, he says.

it is whatever one imagines it to be, nancy says.

like us imagining the island, adam says.

something like that, he says.

and the point to it is to keep ourselves amused, adam says.

that is the point to everything, he says.

that's an explanation, steve says.

perhaps the only one we need, nancy says.

in our own paradise, adam says.

the walled garden, he says.

but many cannot find that for themselves, nancy says.

too bad for them, he says.

but we should care, nancy says.

but i don't, he says. as long as they leave me the fuck alone they can do what they want to each other and themselves.

let them eat cake, steve says.

right, he says.

but they won't leave us alone, nancy says. they'll come get us.

yeah, adam says. someone needs to take the blame.

we have already been driven out as the sacrificial goat, steve says.

which turned out the be the best thing that could have happened to us, he says.

yeah, adam says. the joke was on them.

but the joke may well come around to be on us, nancy says.

but we have the island, adam says. no one knows where it is or how to find it.

yeah, he says. one can only be shipwrecked here from the storm.

here at the heart of the world, nancy says.

if they only knew, adam says.

but they never will, steve says.

and he goes up to eat some yogurt.

so, adam says, what are we doing now?

we're still keeping ourselves amused, he says.

but what do other people do? adam says.

pretty much the same thing, he says.

and we watch and wait, nancy says.

for what? adam says.

to see what might happen next, nancy says.

what might happen next could be pretty grim, steve says.

there's always that possibility, nancy says.

or it could be something quite delightful, he says.

i suppose, steve says, but i doubt that.

it is what we make it to be, nancy says.

yeah, he says. the yin/yang of it all.

we are still under the spell of the knowledge of good and evil, adam says.

when god creates everything and pronounces it good, he says. then we come along and say we like this and don't like that and create all sorts of problems for ourselves trying to fix what wasn't broken to begin with.

according to some theories, steve says.

yes, he says.

and april gets up and goes off to work while his baby still lies sleeping.

as he sits before the computer wondering about this and that and the other thing of it all.

as he watches and waits hoping for the best and doubting the worst.

as it all comes true or not.

as he just grows old and then he'll die.

as he tries to keep himself amused with this.

and it does and doesn't.

as he writes out of compulsive need.

all the thoughts in his head whirling around and around.

as he is boring but never bored.

as people have generally had about enough of him who have come to know him.

easily dismissed as nobody as is much of the human race.

the billions and billions of nobodies.

and most of us couldn't care less.

as a spaceship hovers nearby.

and what about all the abused and sick and starving children in the world? nancy says.

what about them? he says.

how do they fit into our theory? nancy says.

i don't know, he says, except to explain it with karma.

that's always a good excuse, steve says.

i find it to be so, he says. it saves me from worrying about it.

so, nancy says, you don't care about them either?

not especially, he says.

but there are many who do, adam says.

not enough, nancy says.

no, he says, probably not.

besides, steve says, which one of us are not abused or sick or starving in some way or another?

the children of all ages, he says.

it's the state of the world, steve says.

blame it on the gods, adam says.

why not? he says. this is all their device.

maybe it's because they want to experience life in all its possible manifestations, steve says, as they dive into it again and again.

experience the life of the abused as well as the abuser, he says.

one can never know just what the gods are up to and have in mind, adam says.

nope, he says.

it's all meaningless dada, steve says.

yes, he says, we must keep reminding ourselves of that.

and it's all pointless save for our amusement, adam says.

which in turn gives it meaning, he says.

that is absurd, nancy says.

humans are absurd creatures, he says.

always have been, steve says, always will be.

so, adam says, how do we keep ourselves amused this way?

it's not as easy as it seems, he says.

simple things for simple minds, steve says.

it would seem that way, he says.

but we still have everything to explain, nancy says.

it think everything explains itself, steve says.

it is what it is, he says.

but who can know exactly what that is that it is? adam says.

that's what we're all trying to discover, he says.

there are those who say it is all the illusion of maya, steve says.

there is that theory, he says.

we need to attain godhead, adam says.

but godhead is mad and laughing and screaming both at once alone in the void, he says.

is that our theory? adam says.

part of it, he says.

but one thing that needs to be remembered with our theory is that it can be proven wrong at any given moment, nancy says.

but that can be said about all theories, adam says.

but there are those theories that hold that they are not a theory but absolute truth, steve says.

universal truth at that, he says.

and then they use it to beat others over the head with it, adam says.

more often than not, he says.

and he decides to load a bowl and takes a couple of tokes or three.

and he goes up to poop.

we make it up any whichever way we might want to imagine it, steve says.

i'm not so sure of anything, he says. it could be this way or that way or the other way.

and it could always be something else, steve says.

whatever the hell that might turn out to be, he says.

one never knows, steve says.

yeah, nancy says, look what's happened so far that was something else at some point.

all the possibilities, he says.

but what about the probabilities? adam says.

and all the impossibilities, steve says.

some things are only possible as impossibilities, he says.

under these present circumstances, nancy says.

true enough, he says. but so far as we know that is all that is possible though we can imagine so many other possibilities.

an infinite number of possibilities, steve says.

if infinity is real and not just a figment of our imagination, he says.

but everything is infinite, adam says.

according to some theories, he says. but we have no way of measuring infinity in order to find out for certain.

everything may not even be everything, steve says.

yeah, he says. how would we know what it might be or not?

so, adam says, this is an endless pursuit.

it would appear to be that way, he says.

all along on the pathless path, nancy says.

as we dance and sing and fall down and laugh, he says.

just before we are taken out and shot, steve says.

as it will be, he says.

as the gods may whim, adam says.

yes, he says.

as he comes out of it and sits before the computer awhile.

as he lights another cigarette.

as he wonders and worries about the possibilities.

this is the future he has had visions of since as much as he can remember.

it all coming to an end this way.

and those of us who survive are stuck with the ruins of it all to make do as we will.

a new creature on the earth.

or not.

as the global structure of it breaks down and we are isolated in the dark from one another again.

except for perhaps some enclaves where they manage to keep some of that going.

heavily armed and protected communities.

and he goes up to take his meds.

so, steve says, now what?

now what the fuck? he says.

exactly, steve says.

that primordial original question we asked ourselves as we stand and gaze out over the savanna, he says.

and we each ask ourselves upon being born to this world of sensation, steve says.

the spectacle of it all, he says.

yes, nancy says.

and we imagined and made up all sorts of answers to that question ever since, he says.

is that what we are doing, nancy says, is to answer that question?

maybe that's what gazorbnik means, he says.

gazorbnik? adam says.

it's a word i might have made up or not, he says. it's meaningless.

until we give it meaning, steve says.

but what meaning could that be? adam says.

our amusement, he says.

of course, adam says.

so, steve says, that's what gazorbnik means?

i think gazorbnik is a verb, he says.

a verb? steve says.

yeah, he says. it's something we do.

to gazorbnik, adam says.

exactly, he says.

so, steve says, what does one do when one gazorbniks?

finds amusement, he says.

so, adam says, to gazorbnik means to find amusement?

sort of, he says.

but how is one to find this amusement? steve says.

anyway one can imagine it, he says.

so, steve says, gazorbnik is all in one's head?

it might be, he says. or not.

it's out in the world? adam says.

as much as we act in the world under its influence, he says.

but imagine all the terrible horrible ways people find to amuse themselves, steve says.

raping and torturing and killing, adam says.

gazorbnik holds no values, he says. it just is what it is.

so, adam says, it's up to us to decide what value to put on things.

yes, he says, as we have been trying to do since forever.

hence our value as being mad, steve says.

yup, he says.

gazorbnik should be the most ultimate thing one might imagine, adam says.

and what might that be? he says.

the orgasm of the universe, steve says.

to gazorbnik should mean to experience the orgasm of the universe, adam says.

that would be amusing, he says.

amusing as all heaven and hell combined, adam says.

combined here on earth, steve says.

the best of all possible worlds and the worst of all possible worlds, he says.

all depending on one's disposition to it, steve says.

all which one may have no control over changing one way or the other, he says.

yes, steve says, we dismissed free will, didn't we?

i don't remember, he says, but we might have.

well, steve says, we dismiss it now if we didn't before.

right, he says.

we don't seem to be able to stick to one thing very well, nancy says.

should we? he says.

yeah, steve says, we are trying to explain everything after all.

but this is all very disorganized, adam says. we should get it together a little more and present it more formally as a theory.

can you imagine any of this being presented formally? he says.

perhaps not, adam says.

this is how it is and how it is best presented as we follow along on the pathless path, he says.

but how is it best understood? adam says.

by osmosis, he says.

osmosis? adam says.

read and absorb, he says.

that's it? adam says.

what else we do? he says. others either buy into it or not.

but i thought there wasn't anything to buy into, steve says.

there isn't, he says.

unless one buys into that, adam says.

this serves merely as an example of how something like this can be done, he says. one is free to steal what one needs from it and improvise for oneself and what one finds to be amusing.

but what if one doesn't find anything amusing? adam says.

then be amused by that, steve says.

be amused by something, he says.

but then one is free to do whatever the fuck one might wish to do, adam says. do we want to encourage that among the masses?

not especially, he says. we want them to keep working. that's what the machine is for.

i do my best, nancy says. but it's all breaking down.

as it should be, he says. the contractions have begun. the birth is in process.

the new creature on the earth, nancy says.

in the ruins of the old world, he says.

to begin again, nancy says.

to invent new configurations of it to be, he says.

to dance and sing and to fall down and to laugh, nancy says.

to gazorbnik, adam says.

all for our amusement, he says.

and us for the amusement of others, nancy says.

but what if their amusement is to rape and torture and kill us? adam says.

if they have the means to do so, he says, what is one supposed to do about it?

i don't know, adam says.

one can try to stay out of their way, nancy says.

and if one can't? he says.

oh well, nancy says. it was fun while it lasted.

and he goes up to piss and to make a peanut butter and raisin sandwich.

and this will be the new creature? adam says.

it might be, he says.

why should it be any different? nancy says.

except we imagine it different, adam says.

as if entering paradise, nancy says.

why not? adam says.

there are countless reasons why not, he says.

but here we are, adam says.

yes, he says. true enough.

now if we could convince others to join us, adam says.

do we really want others to join us? he says. i hate people. they're all creepy.

just to join us in imagination of paradise, nancy says.

that could be what gazorbnik means, adam says. to imagine paradise.

to imagine and be in paradise, he says.

and do as little harm to others as one can get away with, nancy says.

that's always been the problem, he says.

people seem to want to do as much harm to others as they can get away with, steve says.

that's where the mind shift/ship comes into it, he says.

what's that? adam says.

as its name implies, he says. it's a ship shifting the mind.

and what does that do? steve says.

it brings one to other psychic dimensions where one is able to walk through the crossfire of the others unharmed, he says.

you sure you don't mean other psychotic dimensions? steve says.

it could mean that, he says. i was quite psychotic on acid when i discovered it.

so, adam says, who pilots the mind shift/ship?

7000 gypsies swirling together, he says.

so, nancy says, you stole this idea too?

i adapted it, he says.

it sounds like the rapture, steve says.

the rapture on acid, he says.

are all of your visions drug induced? steve says.

no, he says. i have them all the time straight as well.

so, adam says, you're some sort of prophet?

no, he says. i see only what others should be able to see.

but they turn away from it, adam says.

i don't see how they can, he says. it's everywhere in everything.

according to our theory, nancy says, which could be proven wrong at any given moment.

right, he says. not to mention all those with their own theories who would argue against it.

motherfuckers, adam says.

not necessarily, he says. not unless we include the motherfuckers on all sides of the argument.

especially our own side, nancy says.

yup, he says.

as he takes a couple more tokes.

as molly is sleeping on her pillow.

as he sits before the computer somewhat mystified by everything.

and he thinks about how the meek inherit the earth when by rights they should be slaughtered wholesale.

the rights of the wrong.

and those who fit and adapt wherever they might find themselves.

so, adam says, i'm lost.

that's what happens sometimes along on the pathless path, he says.

just remember that's where you are, nancy says.

be here now, steve says.

right, he says.

being lost is scary, adam says.

being scared is amusing, he says.

as the mad god is laughing and screaming both at once, steve says.

right, he says.

and he goes up to bring in a grocery delivery.

him and his baby both hate to go shipping.

and then carla the tranny whore who works the saloon in town joins them coming in the open kitchen door to sit at the table.

hey, carla says

hey, they say.

so, carla says, what are all of you up to?

explaining everything, nancy says.

what about everything? carla says.

everything about everything, he says.

that seems like a lot to take on, carla says.

it is and it isn't, steve says.

most of our work is done by other theories we throw together into it that cancel each other out so we don't have as much to deal with, he says.

that's special, carla says.

and he goes to watch a baseball game.

and he falls asleep.

and he wakes up and goes up for a nap with his baby.

and he wakes up and makes coffee.

he farts.

he takes a toke or two.

so, steve says, are we ready to go again?

i suppose, he says.

so, carla says, why are we explaining everything?

it amuses us, adam says.

is that all? carla says.

is there another reason? steve says.

i suppose not, carla says. but who are we explaining it to? doesn't everyone pretty much know what everything is?

no one knows what everything is, steve says. it's still a mystery.

but not to us, adam says. we have gazorbnik.

what's gazorbnik? carla says.

we're not sure yet, adam says. but it might explain everything.

it does? carla says.

but the problem is, steve says, what explains gazorbnik?

i can't imagine, carla says.

but that's what it takes, adam says, is imagination.

we're imagining the whole thing, steve says.

we imagine everything? carla says.

that's a possibility our theory holds, he says.

we have a theory? carla says.

everyone has a theory, steve says.

everyone's theory is included in with ours, adam says.

right, carla says. and they all cancel each other out.

not all, steve says. we wait to see what falls out of it.

and what has fallen out so far? carla says.

gazorbnik, adam says.

sort of, he says. actually i thought of gazorbnik a long time ago – i think.

but time is irrelevant, steve says. there is no real cause and effect.

there isn't? carla says.

there may not be, he says.

there's arguments that go all ways about that, steve says.

as there are arguments that go all ways about everything, he says.

except for gazorbnik, adam says.

why not gazorbnik? carla says.

no one knows what it is yet, adam says, so there can be no argument about it.

well, carla says, that's all very well but i actually came here to see if anyone wanted to fuck.

i do, nancy says.

so carla slips off her dress to revel she has nothing on underneath and her well hung cock beginning to stir to life as nancy gets down on her knees to help it along stroking it and kissing and licking it to full attention as she then turns around and presents herself to carla who crouches behind her and gives her what for bumping and grinding away until they cum together at once.

and meanwhile adam and steve have been getting excited watching and grab each other's cocks and jerk one another off and cum at the same time as carla and nancy.

and they light cigarettes after except adam.

so, he says, now everyone's got their ya-yas out maybe we can continue.

continue with what? steve says.

everything, he says.

aren't we done with that already? adam says.

hardly, he says. we haven't really even begun.

how do we begin? carla says.

the beginning, he says.

but there's so many theories about what the beginning might be, adam says.

i like ours the best, steve says.

what is ours? carla says.

well, he says, there is god all alone in the void and as what would happen with any conscious mind in a similar situation it goes mad and hallucinates everything laughing and screaming at the possibility of it all.

that sounds cool, carla says. but what if there isn't a god?

that's one of the problems, he says. there are many theories that would argue that there isn't.

there may be nothing but pure random chance possibility, steve says.

and what does our theory say about that? carla says.

it's a possibility, he says.

of course, carla says.

all things might be real and true, adam says.

so, carla says, we are looking for what's real and true?

i think everyone is doing that, he says.

and many feel that they have found it, steve says.

but don't we feel that we have found it? carla says.

of course, he says. we wouldn't be bothering anyone with anything if we didn't.

except as it amuses us, steve says.

which is exactly what we have found, he says.

amusement? carla says.

yes, he says. we have found amusement in everything.

but things are so terrible, carla says.

but things are also so wonderful, adam says.

it's when one finds the balance between the two that one begins to find amusement, he says.

and this is part of our theory? carla says.

it's more than that, steve says. this is what we imagine is real and true about our theory.

we only imagine? carla says.

we only can imagine, he says. it's beyond us otherwise.

yes, carla says. i understand.

so, adam says, have we any more thoughts about what gazorbnik might mean?

i like it that it means nothing, steve says.

but what use is that to anyone? adam says.

who says gazorbnik has to be useful? steve says.

it should be, adam says. otherwise why bother with it?

who says we should bother with it? steve says.

so we have something to give to other people they might find amusement with, adam says.

wasn't that what we said gazorbnik meant? he says. to find amusement in everything?

i thought it was to experience the orgasm of the universe, nancy says.

wow, carla says. i wouldn't mind experiencing that.

just relax and find the groove and dig it, nancy says.

yes, carla says, i see what you mean.

so, adam says, we are saying that is what gazorbnik means?

i don't see why not, he says.

among other things, steve says.

what other things? carla says.

whatever causes one amusement, steve says.

like raping and torturing and killing people, adam says.

and realizing that there are others who find amusement trying to prevent one from doing that or punishing one after, steve says.

in other words, he says, all the things in the world and even the universe is there for our amusement.

but why must there be such terrible things? carla says. wouldn't it be better if there weren't?

who's to say what's what? steve says. we each have different ideas about what is terrible and what is not.

yeah, he says, hacking someone to bits with a machete may seem terrible to many people but others get off on it and see it as beautiful.

i happen to think it's terrible to hurt someone else, carla says.

you and many others, he says. maybe even most others.

but that doesn't make any difference, steve says.

it should, carla says. i get tired of living in a world where such things occur.

but you say tomato and i say potato, steve says.

i suppose, carla says.

and as we said, he says, who is to decide?

so, carla says, anything goes?

anything does go already, he says. it's just that we are in such conflict about it all that we are left with the world as it is in both order and chaos.

both heaven and hell, nancy says.

yes, carla says, it does seem that way.

we have tried for thousands of years if not longer to try to work this out so it amuses everyone, steve says, but we still haven't been able do it.

if only we could get everyone to agree, carla says.

agree with what? he says.

to agree just not to harm one another, carla says.

that's the way you want it, steve says. but there are those who would disagree.

violently disagree, adam says.

i still feel that something should be done about it, carla says.

like what? steve says.

and how? adam says.

and why? nancy says.

i don't know, carla says.

nor does anybody else, he says.

but is that what we're trying to come up with? carla says.

it could be, he says.

i would like it if we did, carla says.

we can only try, he says.

so, nancy says, where do we begin with that?

i have no idea, he says.

everything anyone has ever tried has failed, steve says.

what about gazorbnik? adam says.

what about it? he says.

it could mean finding the answer, adam says.

but what is the answer? steve says.

gazorbnik itself, adam says.

that just goes in a circle, steve says.

i suppose, adam says.

we're not going to come up with anything, he says.

and suppose we did? steve says. who's gonna listen to us?

maybe someone, adam says. and then they tell someone else and on and on it goes like that.

we just need to be the spark, carla says.

but what we need is the spark, he says. and that's what will never happen.

lots of things were supposed to be that, steve says. and look what happened with them. they've all been corrupted in some way or another.

but something always manages to get through about them still, he says. that's where i stole most of my ideas.

and what have you got from any of it? steve says.

i found amusement, he says.

but your amusement would bore someone else outta their skull, adam says.

people want thrills and chills, steve says. they want that roller coaster ride.

not everyone, he says. there's many who it is driving them nuts. they want out.

stop the world i wanna get off, adam says.

exactly, he says.

but you've managed to do that, adam says.

for the moment, he says. but i may be thrown back into it at anytime.

when the world collapses in on itself, nancy says.

yup, he says.

so, carla says, maybe we don't come up with something for everyone. but we can help out others who want out too.

but do we want to do that? he says. who will work and support us?

we give them something that allows them to find amusement in what they are already doing, carla says.

but they already have that, steve says. who doesn't do what they are doing because they are amused by it?

all those who are forced to, carla says.

and what are we supposed to do about that? steve says.

we need to come up with something, carla says.

but people being forced to do what they aren't amused by is how we get most of our daily needs met, he says.

but it shouldn't be that way, carla says.

probably not, he says. but what would you have us do?

i don't know, carla says. but if any of this is going anywhere that is where it needs to go.

i would agree, steve says.

this is where the evolution and birth of the new creature on the earth comes in, nancy says.

like that is ever gonna happen, steve says.

yeah, he says, we can't just sit around and hope for that.

the answer needs to be in the here and now, adam says.

it needs to be accessible to everyone, carla says.

this is accessible to nearly everyone, adam says.

for the moment, he says, before the lights go out.

true enough, adam says. we have a time limit.

who knows how much longer we're going to be able to remain connected like this? steve says.

it's anybody's guess, he says.

so, adam says, what exactly is it we are trying to come up with?

something that'll amuse everybody, he says.

well, steve says, i'm pretty amused by what we are doing whether it goes anywhere or not.

but few other people would be, he says.

yeah, steve says. i can dig that.

i still say it could be gazorbnik, adam says.

but that doesn't mean anything, he says.

that's what leaves it open to mean anything, adam says.

we understand that, steve says, but will anyone else?

we can only put it out there and see, adam says.

we probably need something more specific, he says.

that's been tried, steve says. there's the ten commandments and the 8 fold path and know thyself and stuff like that. all dead in the water.

yeah, he says. what hasn't been tried?

what isn't dead in the water? steve says.

not much, he says.

we're dead in the water on the island, nancy says.

i suppose, he says.

what about all of us becoming the christ? adam says.

it's possible, nancy says.

it would seem to be our only hope, adam says.

it might be, he says.

we become the christ? carla says.

when the wheat is separated from the chaff, adam says, on the threshing floor of the world coming to an end as we know it.

and what will that do? carla says.

it may bring us into one mind about everything, he says.

but there's a lot of people who'll resist that happening, steve says.

to hell with them, adam says.

that is what many theories state will happen, he says.

and why should we care? adam says.

i refuse to step one foot into heaven if that means one person going to hell, he says.

but you already are in heaven, nancy says.

but in my heaven no one goes to hell, he says.

and he goes up to take his meds and put an oscillating fan together for the bedroom.

he has a couple more tokes.

but watching people burn in their own torment in hell is supposed to be one of the delights of heaven, steve says.

not for me, he says.

then you'll probably not make it to heaven, steve says.

but i thought that's what this is, he says.

but you still worry and concern yourself with things, nancy says. you are not at peace.

is heaven constantly being in peace? he says. it sounds boring as hell.

that is what one's imagination is for, nancy says, to keep oneself occupied and amused.

there is nothing left in the world for me to do, he says, except to do those things that sustain me day to day.

your damn idle amusement, nancy says.

the devil's playground, steve says.

it is that, he says.

so, carla says, are we getting any closer to anything?

closer to what? he says.

closer to anything we might be able to tell anyone about living in peace. love and understanding, carla says.

i don't know about love, steve says.

how about tolerance? he says.

yeah, steve says. we can still hate one another and agree to tolerate one another.

we never have been able to before, he says.

until now, adam says.

how? he says.

gazorbnik, adam says.

right, he says.

and what about those whose heaven is war? steve says.

we give them their valhalla, carla says. they can play their war games for all eternity. just leave the rest of us alone.

but what if they don't leave us alone? he says.

we need some power to hold them at bay, steve says.

the magick power of gazorbnik, adam says.

gazorbnik has magick power? carla says.

first i heard about it, he says.

why not? adam says.

because there's no such thing as magick power, steve says.

that's not what everyone believes, adam says.

no, steve says, i suppose not.

and one doesn't know until one tries it for oneself and finds out it does, adam says.

and how does one do that? he says.

improvise, adam says. experiment.

i suppose, he says. i don't think we should count on it through.

like you count on the mind shift/ship, adam says. that sounds pretty magical.

it's metaschizophrenic science, he says.

so is gazorbnik, adam says.

i suppose, he says. i still have my doubts.

of course, adam says. we should all be in doubt. the world would be a better place.

probably, he says.

and one only needs a very small amount of doubt to create wonders, adam says.

a mustard seed's worth? he says.

not even that, adam says. a particle of doubt will do.

i suppose, he says.

so, carla says, where are we now?

we're still working on it, he says. don't worry.

i'm not worried, carla says. i am concerned however.

we all are concerned, he says.

i'm not, steve says.

why not? he says.

i'm busy being amused, steve says.

we all are amused, he says. but for some that also means concern.

not me, steve says.

ok, he says.

so, nancy says, are we any closer to it?

we don't even know what it is, he says.

it is so many things to so many people, adam says.

it can be anything, he says.

it can be everything, nancy says.

it could be nothing, steve says.

yes, he says.

but attempts to find some universal answer have dramatically failed, adam says.

that is why we have it, he says. it is universal but is individual and personal as well.

that's been done, steve says.

everything has been done, he says. but we cut it up and mix it together new ways each time.

and it already means the epitome apex thing, adam says.

that's where we're at, he says.

the mind of the mad god laughing and screaming all around us, nancy says.

all following along on the pathless path, he says.

being here now, nancy says.

yup, he says.

anybody wanna fuck? nancy says.

the others agree as nancy comes over to adam and kneels and sucks his cock to full attention then straddles him taking it into her pussy as steve comes up behind her and sticks his cock up her ass while carla comes around front and nancy sucks her cock as they all groove like this awhile then all cum together at once.

they light cigarettes after except adam.

so, he says, there is still whatever the fuck we're talking about to talk about.

we were talking about gazorbnik being the answer to all our dreams coming true, adam says.

and is it? steve says.

we could claim it is, adam says. who could prove us wrong?

anyone who might happen to come along, steve says.

well, adam says, we say that it only happens in imagination.

so, steve says, what good is that?

many people's imaginations are terrible scary places, adam says. but if one realizes how to gazorbnik then all of that is dispelled.

and what does that do? steve says.

people won't be psychophobic, he says.

what's psychophobic? adam says.

it's a term imagined by r.d.laing to mean the fear of the mind, he says.

what about psychophilia? adam says.

i suppose there would be such a thing, he says. i may suffer from it myself.

i would say definitely, nancy says.

is it suffering? adam says.

the suffering of joy, he says.

the joy of amusement, adam says.

yes, he says.

and he goes up to get some chocolate ice cream.

so, carla says, this is interesting but does any of it get us any closer to anything?

we can't know for certain if it does or doesn't, he says.

we can't know anything for certain, steve says.

there are many possibilities in all directions, he says.

we can't even know that for certain, steve says.

nor what you're saying for certain, he says.

and molly licks up some of his ice cream.

so, nancy says, i think we're drifting.

drifting from what? he says.

calra's concern, nancy says.

which is what again? he says.

i am concerned about all the pain and suffering in the world, carla says.

become a buddhist, he says.

but what about all the others? carla says.

let them become buddhists, he says.

is that what we offer anyone, carla says, to send them off someplace else?

almost anywhere else is better off than here with us, he says.

so, carla says, what are we doing then?

we are trying to work on alleviating your concern, he says.

how? carla says.

the only way we know how, he says. to gazorbnik.

gazorbnik alleviates one's concern? carla says.

if one allows it to, he says.

what about those who cannot allow themselves to for some reason? carla says.

fuck them, steve says. why should we care?

i sometimes wish i could feel the same as you, carla says.

all one has to do is to doubt, steve says.

i'd rather hope, carla says.

hope is doomed, steve says.

perhaps, carla says, but i won't give up on it.

you're a fool, steve says.

i've been called worse, carla says.

i'm sure you have, steve says.

i'm used to it, carla says.

so, nancy says, how do we alleviate one's concern?

have them taken out and shot, steve says.

long live the revolution, he says.

we tell them to gazorbnik, adam says.

but no one knows what that means, he says. not even us.

i thought it was to experience the orgasm of the universe, adam says.

but who knows how to do that? he says.

we do, adam says.

besides us? he says.

we have no way of knowing, adam says. it could be anyone.

it could be everyone, he says.

i doubt that, adam says.

yeah, he says. me too.

and he decides to go up and go to bed.

he wakes up and makes coffee and comes down to the bunker and out to the house by the garden where the others are at.

hey, they say.

hey, he says.

so, nancy says, you awake?

sort of, he says.

good, nancy says, we got things to do.

like what? he says.

like figuring out what the fuck we're talking about, nancy says.

we're talking about whatever amuses us for the moment, he says.

we should be doing more than that, carla says.

like what? he says.

that's just idle amusement, carla says. we should be more active.

active like what? he says.

like giving people something they might have use for, carla says.

but we're useless, adam says.

yeah, he says. this should serve as a warning of what not to do.

i don't think we're as useless as all that, carla says. we're trying to come up with some answers.

but all we have to show for it is gazorbnik, he says. and none of us seems to know what that means or should mean.

it should mean everyone living in peace, love and understanding, carla says.

that's funny, steve says.

why is it funny? carla says.

it's funny that people actually believe we can ever attain that, steve says.

it's possible, carla says.

but highly doubtful, steve says.

so, carla says, does that mean we just give up?

why should that be the goal? steve says. many would find that kind of life hell on earth.

yeah, he says, it would be awfully boring.

which is why the gods would not allow it, steve says.

the gods want what's in our best interest, carla says.

there's no evidence for that, steve says.

yeah, adam says, the gods are fuckers. their only interest is what amuses them.

and are we any better? carla says.

we don't claim to be, he says.

and he goes up for more coffee.

but we should be better, carla says.

yeah, steve says, but we're not.

but we can try, carla says.

too much like work, he says.

and what would constitute being better? steve says.

living in peace, love and understanding, carla says.

but we're doing that, he says.

but you hate people, nancy says.

i love them from a distance, he says, as long as they don't bother me and leave me alone.

just as we don't bother them and leave them alone, steve says.

if only they would follow our example, adam says.

there's too many people who enjoy fucking with other people, he says. it's like they're on a mission.

they are on a mission, steve says. they have a big idea and are going to beat everyone over the head with it.

just like we're doing, adam says.

are we doing that? he says.

sure, steve says. isn't that what gazorbnik means to beat someone over the head with one's big idea?

it shouldn't, he says.

we already have enough words for things, carla says. why do we need gazorbnik for?

but people invent new words all the time, he says, when the old words have lost their meaning.

but does it get us any closer to anything? carla says.

it gets us closer to our madness, adam says.

is that all we are, carla says, is mad?

i've been certified, he says.

but you should be the most who wants a resolution to everything, nancy says. you're been a victim of it your whole life.

boo-fucking-hoo, steve says.

right, he says. my life has been pretty much cake so far.

let them eat cake, steve says. that's what gazorbnik should mean.

we're getting nowhere, carla says.

now here, adam says.

yeah, steve says. this is where it's all happening.

where what's happening, carla says.

gazorbnik, adam says.

but that doesn't mean anything, carla says.

that's what's happening, steve says. nothing that means anything.

and are we satisfied with that? carla says.

we learn to deal with it, he says.

that's what i meant before about us being more active, carla says. we should make things happen.

we're part of bringing the world to its knees, steve says. what's more happening than that?

we are what's wrong with the world today, he says. a prime example.

i don't think so, carla says.

many others would think so, he says. and they're the ones who run the world.

yeah, adam says, we're nobody to them. they think they'd be better off without us dragging them down.

and they're probably right, he says. think of the things they could accomplish without us being dead weight.

but what is it all without compassion for others? carla says.

but people like us take advantage of that compassion, steve says. we just want our free ride.

and we got it, he says, for as long as it lasts.

but we're contributing, carla says.

how? he says.

working out the answer for everything, carla says.

like we'll ever find it, steve says.

we've got gazorbnik, adam says. isn't that enough?

it depends on if others pick it up or not, steve says.

yeah, he says. i can see everyone chanting it in the streets.

it could start the world revolution, adam says.

as if, steve says.

it's possible, he says.

one never knows, adam says.

and what would that world revolution accomplish? steve says.

a new era of peace, love and understanding, carla says.

you're not going to drop that, steve says, are you?

why should i? carla says. it's what needs to happen.

but we've already stated that that would be hell for many people, steve says. they'd resist and rebel and we'd be right back where we are.

those people would be set off to do whatever they want on their own and leave us alone, carla says.

and who's gonna impose this? he says.

the will of the rest of us, carla says.

yeah, nancy says, when we become the christ.

but the others have all the guns, steve says. if anyone is gonna impose their will on anyone it will be them on us.

but we'll have the magic power of gazorbnik, adam says, that'll render all their weapons useless.

you're dreaming, steve says.

i'd rather be dreaming than not have any dreams at all, carla says.

and you'll be subject to the will of others your whole life, steve says.

but our dreams have brought us all here to the island, he says.

i suppose, steve says.

so, adam says, if we could have it what would be our ideal?

for everyone to live in peace, love and understanding, carla says.

i don't agree with that, steve says. it's too boring.

yeah, adam says. and it'd be creepy with everyone going around smiling all the time.

there'd be plenty of things to do, carla says. the arts could flourish.

hacking someone to death with a machete is art, steve says.

not that art, carla says. art of beauty.

listening to their screams and watching their blood spurting is beauty, steve says.

you don't really mean that, carla says.

not me personally, steve says, but there'd be others who would feel that way.

it takes all kinds to make up the world, he says.

but those things only occur because we're under stress, carla says. if the world were different we would be too.

but we can't even agree among ourselves, nancy says. how are we supposed to communicate anything to anyone else?

no matter what we might come up with, he says, it always comes down to a matter of how do we bring it about.

we have a revolution and take over, adam says, and force people to do what we know is in their best interest.

that's always been the story, he says, and it has failed miserably each and every time.

but we'll be the ones who actually do it, adam says.

how? he says.

gazorbnik will give us the power, adam says.

but can we be trusted with it if it did? he says.

better us than anyone else, adam says.

i don't know, steve says. we're kinda sick and twisted ourselves. i have all sorts of nasty things i'd like to do to people if i had the power.

gazorbnik won't allow you to do that, adam says. it can only be used for good and benefit of others.

and who determines what that is? steve says.

we're all confused, he says, being under the spell of the knowledge of good and evil. it cannot be left for us to decide.

then something else comes into play and decides for us, adam says.

we might as well believe in jesus, steve says.

i thought we did, nancy says.

not in the way the others do, he says.

of course not, steve says. we always have to be different.

we were born different, he says. it's not like we have a choice.

so, carla says, how do we believe in jesus?

jesus doesn't come down from heaven to save us, nancy says. the christ rises up from within us and we save ourselves.

and for each that is expressed in different ways, he says.

but that just puts us in the same position as we are in now, steve says.

how so? he says.

i go back to our machete wielding friend, steve says.

that's not an expression of christ, nancy says.

says who? steve says.

it'll be that way as the world comes to an end, he says. everybody will get their ya-yas out on everybody else. but then the fever breaks and we can settle down for some peace, love and understanding for once and for all.

boring, steve says. i want to kill and kill again.

you won't feel that way when the christ is awakened within you, nancy says.

i'd rather be dead, steve says.

that can be arranged, he says.

it'll be arranged for billions, nancy says.

billions of the innocent, he says.

there are no innocent, nancy says. not in this world.

so, carla says, we just sit here and watch and wait?

what else can one do? he says.

as i said, carla says, we need to take an active part in bringing this about.

but we're doing that, adam says.

we're doing nothing, steve says.

but we're working it out and posting what we come up with for others to read and be turned on to, adam says.

we can't turn people on to what they don't want to be turned on to, he says.

there'll be people who resist just for the sake of resisting, steve says.

yeah, he says, whatever way we look at it and whatever we might come up with there'll be someone who rebels against it.

yeah, steve says. then we'd be left with the same problem of how to impose our will on theirs.

and he goes up for yogurt and to take his meds.

but with our theory, nancy says, it all rises up from within us. it frees us from all our pent up frustrations that cause us to act the way we do toward one another and ourselves.

i doubt that, steve says.

i doubt anything else, he says.

well, steve says, then we disagree.

i can agree with that, he says.

well, steve says, what if i don't? what if i impose what i think on you?

others have tried, he says.

and it would seem they've been successful, steve says. they got you locked up down in your bunker.

i do that of my own free will, he says.

like you had any other choice, steve says.

it's the direction i chose to live my life, he says. i sought paradise and i found it.

but it's all only in your head, steve says.

that's all it needs to be, he says.

wouldn't you like to be free and go outside into the world without being afraid all the time? steve says.

no, he says. look at me now. here i am with a whole island free to explore and i sit in a kitchen doing nothing. this has always been my ideal.

that's pretty sad, steve says.

it works, he says.

and this is what we have to offer others? adam says.

we offer others our amusement, he says.

and if they are not amused? adam says.

they don't have to read it, he says. they can amuse themselves with something else.

like stock car races, steve says.

if they want to, he says.

but that's just stupid, steve says.

to us it might be, he says. but who are we to say what others should be into or not? most people cringe at what i'm into.

like writing endless meaningless dada, steve says.

exactly, he says.

and he loads a bowl and takes a couple of tokes.

and there are many who would take offence at some of the things we are talking about, adam says.

to some it would represent what's wrong with the world today, steve says.

then let them, he says. why should we care what others think?

they have the power to come after us, adam says, to have us taken out and shot.

well, he says, until then we just live our lives as we can.

they'll change their tune when the christ awakens within us, nancy says.

then we can have them taken out and shot, steve says.

i don't think so, he says.

well, steve says, what's the sense in having a revolution if one doesn't get to have people taken out and shot?

they'll be busy shooting each other, nancy says.

yeah, he says, while we walk through the crossfire in the mind shift/ship.

the mind shift/ship gazorbnik, adam says.

if you wish, he says.

so, steve says, let's say for the moment that this is gonna happen. what is anything we're doing have to do with it?

we're imagining it, he says. and we post this for others to read and maybe imagine it too.

what few might actually be interested in doing that, steve says.

it need not be any, he says. it's enough that we imagine it to give it that much more possibility of happening.

we send out our energy toward it happening, nancy says.

but there's billions of others all sending out their energy into what they want to happen instead, steve says.

yeah, he says, one glance at the internet will tell one that.

yeah, steve says, and then there's the ones who are in a position to act on making sure that it happens their way.

but how many people who are individually powerless have similar visions as we do whose collective energy will override all that? nancy says.

one never knows, he says.

another reason to post this on the off chance someone might read it and dig it, nancy says.

but, steve says, all things being equal and in balance it'll all come to a stalemate and nothing will happen any different than now.

it might, he says. but we can always still hope it doesn't and it goes our way.

are we taking sides now? steve says.

we have always been on our side, he says.

then what makes us any different than anyone else? steve says.

we try to be as inclusive and open as possible, he says, whereas the other sides are exclusive and closed.

but we still reject the guy with the machete, steve says.

we have pretty much rejected everyone, he says.

then how are we inclusive? steve says.

we include every possible idea the others might come up with in with our theory, he says.

even the machete idea? steve says.

even that, he says.

and what do we do with it all, steve says.

we imagine it, he says.

we imagine all of it? steve says.

as much of it as we can, he says.

even the dark ugly parts, steve says.

even those, he says.

like abducting a fat pregnant woman into the back of a van and driving her off to where we cut her belly open and take out and eat the still living fetus while she screams in agony and horror while we laugh and laugh and then fuck her up the ass and piss and shit on her and abandon her to slowly die with all of that vivid in her head wondering why, steve says.

even that, he says.

but that's wrong, carla says.

it's what some people imagine all the time, steve says, and worse.

yeah, he says, whether they act on it or not doesn't matter.

so, carla says, how does us imagining it help us any?

it amuses us, he says.

it doesn't amuse me, carla says.

what does then? steve says. or are you pure of thought?

no, carla says, but it's not so bad to try to be.

it can't be done, he says. we all have an ape inside us that gets off on shit like this is some form or another.

but we don't need to wallow in it like others do, carla says.

we're not doing that, steve says. we just mention it in passing and continue on as before having added it in with our theory.

i suppose, carla says.

and he goes up to make an onion bagel and cream cheese and to piss.

you know, nancy says, there might be some who take offense to your reporting of bodily functions all the time.

too bad, he says. there'd also be those offended by you guys having sex.

too bad, nancy says. wait till we get to the harder stuff.

right, he says.

there are those who will feel that this is utter nonsense, steve says.

too bad for them too, he says.

yeah, adam says, if they don't want to find amusement in it then fuck them.

and you'd love to do just that, he says.

yes, adam says, i would. or have them fuck me too.

you're such a slut, he says.

you love it, adam says. it's just the way you imagine me.

it would seem so, he says.

so, carla says, it seems we are becoming somewhat lost again.

lost from what? he says.

lost form us collectively imagining the world as a paradise, carla says.

i don't think i want the same paradise that others would want, steve says.

probably not, he says.

that's why paradise is all in our heads, nancy says. we can each enjoy it individually just the way we want it to be.

so, he says, we all become solipsists to ourselves?

what other way is there to please the masses? steve says.

and now we have the technology to do it, nancy says.

you said we all going to become cyborgs, adam says. paradise is us all merging into the machine.

but that'll probably only be available for the few, he says.

at first, steve says, but it'll eventually spread to everyone else like others things have done in the past.

like indoor plumbing, nancy says.

i hate indoor plumbing, adam says. i'd rather pee into a stream and shit in the woods.

just like the pope, he says.

right, adam says.

then frank the hermaphrodite bartender from the same saloon carla works comes in the open kitchen door and joins them at the table.

hey, frank says.

hey, they say.

so, frank says, what's up?

we're talking about paradise, adam says.

what about it? frank says.

whether it's attainable or not, nancy says.

but we're living in it, frank says.

that's for us, he says. but what about everyone else?

they can find their own, frank says.

and if they can't? nancy says.

too bad for them, frank says.

but we're trying to make paradise attainable to everyone, carla says.

then it just gets diluted down to the lowest common denominator and that's exactly what the world is now, frank says.

unless it's produced and marketed to fit anyone's personal individual requirements, steve says.

is this a product we're selling? frank says.

it could be, steve says. it depends on what we come up with.

i won't be part of anything that is for sale, he says.

yes, steve says, you've already been bought out.

so, frank says, who's interested in a little fucking?

and the others all say they are and carla slips off her dress while frank steps out of her overalls and they embrace and kiss with probing tongues fondling each other's tits then down to their cocks coming to life as frank lies down on her back and spreads her legs while carla rubs her cock on frank's pussy then inserts it and begins pumping at her while nancy comes and mounts frank taking her cock inside her cunt and they all rock and roll together until they cum together at once along with adam and steve who'd been 69ed on the floor sucking each other's cocks.

and they light cigarettes after except adam.

so, nancy says, what does any of it have to do with what we might be talking about?

or what does anything we might be talking about have to do with it? steve says.

either way, nancy says.

it's just something we're imaging that amuses us, he says, that's all.

it also answers the question of what to do with all the evil people in the world, steve says. give them their own individual personalized paradise to imagine all by themselves away from everyone else.

and what about those who would rebel against this and try to disrupt it for everyone else? he says.

have them taken out and shot, steve says.

so, he says, we are imposing order on everyone.

and not a moment too soon, steve says.

i suppose, he says.

so, nancy says, have we come up with a solution?

perhaps, he says. but now how to convince others to go along with it.

why do we need to do that? adam says.

then why are we writing this out and posting it? he says.

because it amuses us, adam says, and it might amuse someone else.

but we also want to turn others on, he says.

turn them on to what? steve says.

to what we've been talking about, he says.

which is what? steve says.

finding paradise, he says.

but that's the easy part, steve says. the hard part is to remain here.

yes, he says, it's so easy to be distracted from it.

but why worry about it for everyone else? steve says. let them find it as they will or not.

but it's them being so fucking miserable that makes it nearly impossible for me to go out into the world among them, he says.

so, steve says, you don't want to go out there.

but it's different not wanting to, he says, and not being able to.

i can see that, steve says.

besides, he says, i am doing this all for my amusement.

yes, steve says, of course.

and he goes up to lie down awhile.

he wakes up and comes down to the bunker.

his baby goes up to make more coffee.

he has a couple of tokes and goes to the beach on the island to sit and watch the waves coming in and going out again.

in awhile nancy comes by to join him.

i thought i'd find you here, nancy says.

yeah, he says, the others are a bit much right now.

well, nancy says, frank and carla went back to work and adam and steve went back to the garden.

oh, he says.

so, nancy says, nice nap?

nice enough, he says.

so, nancy says, how do you think this is all going?

it's not going anywhere, he says.

what did you expect? nancy says.

i expect nothing from nobody, he says.

well, nancy says, we're a bunch of nobodies.

you got that right, he says. and i can't control even what's going on inside my own head.

they don't appreciate the seriousness of it, nancy says.

the seriousness of it? he says. it's not supposed to be serious at all. it's only for our amusement.

then it serves its function, nancy says. i think we're all amused.

yeah, he says. what else can we do? we are powerless.

is power what you want? nancy says.

the power to get everyone to chill the fuck out, he says.

they'll chill out after they have their fun destroying the world, nancy says.

i doubt it even then, he says.

they'll be too busy trying to survive, nancy says, for much of anything else.

i wouldn't know, he says. i won't be here to see it.

you don't plan to survive? nancy says.

i have medications that keep me alive, he says. they're not going to be available after. plus no one will be interested in anyone who refuses to co-operate and is just dead weight in a world too lean to support me and my kind.

what is your kind? nancy says.

we are them, he says.

right, nancy says. whatever that means.

for every group that refers to itself as us there is a corresponding them opposed to it, he says. in any given social situation we are them.

the universal them group, nancy says.

something like that, he says.

he goes up for more coffee.

so, nancy says, i kinda wish adam and steve were here.

and so he imagines them walking up the beach arm in arm and joining them sitting in a circle.

so, steve says, anything new to report?

we are them, nancy says.

we are? adam says.

yes, he says. you two are definitely them.

should we be flattered? steve says.

to be universally hated? he says. to always be one of them?

is that what it means? adam says.

it means to be both blessed and cursed, he says.

well, steve says, i certainly feel that way most of the time.

but isn't everybody them? adam says.

they are to specific oppositional groups, he says. we are them to everyone.

we are all apes with our social hierarchies, steve says.

of which we are universally outcast, he says.

as we have had to exist in the wilderness inside our own heads, adam says.

until we found paradise, nancy says.

but only for ourselves, he says. me, myself and i.

you always have been selfish and greedy, nancy says.

yes, he says, i have.

and he puts a fan together for the bunker getting hot.

and they decide that they're hungry and fly off back to the house by the garden.

they decide on sandwiches of deli meat and cheese with sour pickles and potato salad on the side.

and nancy breaks out another bottle of vodka from the freezer to pass around.

so, steve says, what about our dilemma?

what dilemma? he says.

weren't we in some sort of dilemma? steve says.

about what? he says.

paradise, steve says, i think.

what's the dilemma of paradise? he says.

what constitutes paradise and for who, steve says.

and what to do about those who don't belong, adam says.

right, he says. what to do about them.

kill them all, steve says.

but we are them, he says.

well, steve says, don't you expect to be taken out and shot at some point in the near or distant future?

yes, he says. it's just a matter of who gets to me first.

well, steve says. most of them will die off on their own anyway.

right, he says.

can't we talk about something else? nancy says. this is becoming gruesome.

life is gruesome, steve says.

but that doesn't mean we need to fantasize about it, nancy says.

i suppose not, he says.

but what do we want to fantasize about? steve says.

why don't we fantasize about what sort of paradise we want? nancy says.

but we already have it, adam says. it's the island.

everything one might wish to imagine can be here, he says.

but what about everyone else in the world? nancy says.

we certainly don't want any of them here, he says.

then what do we do with them? nancy says.

let them live in the outer darkness, steve says.

let them find their own paradise, he says.

which may include having us taken out and shot, steve says.

does it always have to come back to that? nancy says.

we have to take everything into account, steve says.

but why always worst case scenarios? nancy says.

it's always best to expect the worst, steve says.

why? nancy says.

so one isn't surprised, steve says.

but one lives one's life in dread, nancy says.

one gets used to it, steve says. it's just one emotion out of all the range of emotions that one feels at any given moment.

like joy, adam says.

there is always joy, he says.

he farts as he sits before the computer wondering about whatever might slip through his mind in the moment.

all in his confused but amused state of being in the world.

and he goes to the store for smokes.

bright and hot out there.

sweating.

as his baby watches her tv and he listens to pandora's weird sounds.

so, steve says, where are we at now?

in paradise, he says.

that walled garden, adam says.

right, he says. what better garden to be in than an island in the eye of a storm on an otherwise calm sea.

the sea of humanity, adam says.

such an ugly state they're in, nancy says.

few are amused, adam says.

at least we are part of those few, steve says.

instead of the churning mass of the masses, he says, in the war that can never be won neverending.

until the christ is awakened within us, nancy says.

as if, steve says.

one never knows, he says.

i guess not, steve says. but i highly doubt it.

one should doubt everything, he says.

speaking of everything, adam says, what about our theory of everything?

that's where we're getting most of what we're talking about from, he says.

oh, adam says.

but we're also still developing it further, he says.

this is just the beta test version, steve says.

right, he says.

he goes up to nuke a spaghetti dinner.

and then jane the young nympho comes walking in the open kitchen door and goes to nancy who clips a leash to jane's dog collar and commands her to kneel between her legs and smell her pussy.

you want some of that? nancy says.

yes, mistress, jane says.

if you're good, nancy says, you can have some. but for now get up and sit.

and jane sits beside nancy.

hey, jane says.

hey, they say.

so, jane says, what's been going on? are all of you still sitting around babbling nonsense all the time?

pretty much that's about it, steve says.

i thought so, jane says.

so, adam says, what have you been up to?

getting gangbanged as much as i can, jane says.

you must be a popular girl, steve says.

i try, jane says.

as he goes up to get some chocolate ice cream.

so, nancy says, where are we at now?

somewhere in the middle, he says. front row center balcony.

let the show begin, steve says.

the greatest show on earth, nancy says.

what is? jane says.

the end of the world as we know it, steve says.

and we feel fine, he says.

until we're taken out and shot, steve says.

we're going to be taken out and shot? jane says.

of course, steve says.

i don't think i like that idea, jane says.

who does? steve says. but it may be the reality we face.

so, jane says, it may not happen.

everything may not happen, adam says.

yes, steve says.

so, jane says, that seems like a pretty depressing thing to be talking about.

but it's such a joy, he says.

it is? jane says. how so?

it is what it is, he says.

it is it and/or it is not it, adam says.

and this and that and the other thing about it, steve says.

imagine it, nancy says.

and the merciful gods that look over us, adam says.

the what? jane says.

the merciful gods, adam says.

the gods are cruel, jane says.

yes, adam says, for the most part. but there are those among them that are merciful.

yeah, jane says, if one prays to them and worships them.

not necessarily, adam says.

the gods smile upon fools, he says.

well, jane says, we certainly are that.

yes, he says. so we're safe for the moment.

but that can change at anytime, steve says.

i'm tired of your dark scenarios, nancy says.

wait until they happen, steve says.

yeah yeah yeah, nancy says. we'll deal with that when they do happen.

be prepared, steve says.

be paranoid, nancy says.

whatever, steve says.

and then carla and frank show up and come in through the open kitchen door and sit at the table.

hey, they say.

hey, the others say.

so, carla says, have we progressed any?

we're still all babbling meaningless dada, steve says.

i don't think that's what it is, carla says.

what does it mean then? steve says.

i don't know if it means anything but what meaning we give it, carla says.

and what meaning would that be? steve says.

peace, love and understanding, carla says.

i thought we dismissed that as being highly unlikely, steve says.

in your view, carla says. i see it as a possibility.

in your dreams, steve says.

and in your nightmares, carla says.

as a matter of fact, steve says, yes. it's a living hell.

good, carla says. now you know how you make others feel.

i don't care about them, steve says.

they don't care about you, carla says.

that's how it should be, steve says.

wait until when love comes to town, carla says.

happy day, steve says.

and he goes up to take his meds and eat a bratdog.

so, he says, i got nothing.

yeah, steve says. it happens.

and he decides to have one more cigarette and go to bed.

(to be continued...)